06 May, 2007

Not saying goodbye to a friend


Okay so this post is going to be about 1 thing.

Saying goodbye.

Yesterday I found out that a woman who I knew from a message board, quite well, we'd emailed and snail mailed each other a bit, died. She was young. Mid 30's. 2 kids. Loving husband. Lived in TX. Had lymphoma. Fought it for over 6 years. In the end it got into her liver and there was nothing left to do. She had chemo, radiation, alternative therapies. God wanted her in heaven so she is there. I will miss her dearly. We both had GSP's and loved them. God speed dear Paula.

The other good bye is someone who I thought was a close friend. We went on excursions and adventures. We laughed and cried. He quit a job somewhere I used to be quite involved in. He didn't tell me. He just said this is it, I'm gone, after 12 years. No nothing.

At this point it's don't let the door hit y0u on the way out. I hope you find what you are looking for. I am not going to enable you to make me the villian because I told you I felt pretty darn hurt that you talked to me the night before and didn't tell me anything. You hurt my Mom and my kid, not physically but emotionally. You've been a part of this family for 9 years and you just walk and not say anything? You've done this before to other people but I thought since you were sober now it might be different. So now you'll be somewhere else and people will stroke you and tell you how wonderful you are but you will be lonely and you will be missing something that you can't put your hands on. Friendship. You burned the bridge bucko. It's done and over. And I am glad that it is. I have my family , my friends and my dogs. And someone who is as flawed as I am but loves me none the less. Later dude. I hope you and your dogs are happy in your house on the hill. My phone is off.

So I got that off my chest. I guess you never know people do you?

Tomorrow will be my day off. I think I am going to swim till I turn into a prune just to get this anger out of me.

Ciao.

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