Action-- yes action

Came home early Tuesday in dire pain. Called doc and finally got a slot today to come in. Saw doc. Doc agreed with me. I said I can go back tomorrow, he said nope, at least a week off. So I go back Tuesday. Being referred to a pain mgmt doctor as soon as the DOL approves. I really need something to be done. Look up thoracic outlet syndrome-traumatic. That's what it is.

Did some shopping at Costco. Wanted to get printer ink but they stopped carrying the Epson cartridges that I need. So I went over to Office Depot, used my Star Teacher card and got their generics for less than it would have cost me at Costco. Good deal.

Used my stepdad's 88 Chevy wagon to get around. What a sled. Drives okay and it's not too bad on the arm. But it smells! Like poop. After I was done with the running around I came home and got the hot water machine going on my arm.

When husband came home we took Chevy back to parents, and then headed out to Walmart, 2 Walgreens and then home with dinner for the big kid. Little kid is at a movie under the stars tonight freezing her tuckus off. Water on sale at Walmart so that is a good thing. I got a sleeveless shirt to wear so I can use my water machine and not have to push up sleeves.

So no terminal observations for a couple of days. I need to get the arm simmered down. It really really hurts. The other night I had 2 glasses of wine and slept like a rock. Probably was a good thing. Today I came home and typed up a fax to the office with my doctors note as a followup, an email to HR with the progress report and doctor's note as information, and a letter to my case worker asking her to intervene with the agency that approves referrals so i can get some help. Funny thing, typing does not bother me. My arms are at my side. Of course I type with all the fingers on my left hand and only 2 on my right. Stranger than fiction, eh?

I am going to go to bed and read. My pooch is waiting for me. The husband is downstairs watching The Military Channel. Must be talking about guns again tonight.

Ciao!
-30-

Been kind of busy

Had an interesting week at work. Wasn't as busy as I would have thought for before a holiday but hey, at least it wasn't terribly dull. Saturday night a guy who was in the well had a full blown grand mal seizure. Scary. And I will bet you dollars to donuts that none of the sups or managers are CPR or first aid trained. Sure didn't seem like it.

Since today is my day off it didn't seem like much of a holiday. The stores were pretty much open, I had to take the kid to Office Depot and then I found out my printer needed a cartridge and I didn't have it in my stash. Crapola. Hopefully the husband will go to Costco tomorrow and buy the 4 pack.

Bought some ribeyes on sale this afternoon and grilled them the right way. After they came off the grill we let them sit for 5 minutes and then plated them. I also sliced 4 Vidalia onions (not nearly enough for this group) and sauteed them and added a touch of brown sugar to make them sweet. They were yummy. Add some corn on the cob and it's near perfection! And some White Zin and life is good.

Tomorrow it's back to work. Hopefully the week will go fast. As long as I am not stuck in the dungeon I will be okay. It gets so boring down there. At least at the bridge you can talk to people.



This is what I had done nearly a year ago. I can do some things which is good, but after a couple of nights of checking wheelchairs I have such pain that I have to take the big gun pain killers. The lump where the biceps was still aches, the top of the shoulder bone throbs and yet the doctor says there is nothing left surgically to do, Well what non surgical things can we do? I watch my posture, do lower body exercises and still hurt like an s-o-b. Nothing like residual pain a year later is there? And yet we have to suck it up and do the "job" we are posted too. Too bad the job irritates the muscles and causes us pain.

I can't think of much else exciting things to share==== Oh we did go see POTC-3 and it was good. Kind of long at 2h45m but it had some good moments.

Ciao.

- 30 -

Working Out a Plan

Well today I worked out. Used a bunch of machines for the lower body and then I rode the bike. I think I will do the bike more than anything else. But of course, without a car how do I get to the gym and home on days that I work? This too will work itself out.

I was so tired this morning. Didn't sleep well at all last night. Swing plays havoc with me. I will take something tonight so I can get to sleep before 0230.

Made brats for dinner tonight. Sauteed some onions in butter and then added some brown sugar. Added the beer and brought it to just below a simmer, and then added the brats. Brought them to just below a simmer and then let them sit and steam. The house smelled so good. Had the bbq lit and then threw them on, and voila, they cooked so fast. We also took the onion pieces out and put them in foil and bbqed them too. Next time I'll let them cook a little longer in the brown sugar before I add the beer. They were good. I did 15 brats and had 2, there are none left. The boys were hungry I guess. Didn't have any potatos so next time I make them I'll make German potato salad and I bet that there won't be any left overs of that either. Potatos and bacon, what more can you ask?

I've shrunk. They measured me at the gym. I'm 5'2" now. Where did that elusive extra inch go? I do need some decent work out shoes and some pants. I have a good top but I need pants. I will have to plan on that when I get another decent check.

Back to the grind tomorrow. I hope that it goes by fast this week. It certainly was busy on Saturday. But everyday is a new day and we shall see how it goes. I haven't had to work with the 2 women who dislike me. That's okay. Just because they think they have the job down pat. Oh hell, I have to find something else in the realm because sitting at an exit for 8 hours is dulling the brain.

So until the next time... I am outta here.

Ciao.

- 30 -

Random thoughts ---Sunday

I'm just enjoying today. Slept in. Didn't get to sleep till nearly 0200 last night. It was busy. I don't think the wheelchairs had a chance to cool down with all the people that were transported up to the entry area. I spent a lot of time asking people to stand back and keep the exit clear and to stand back and let the passengers get off the elevator before they started to board it.

Saw some good hootch get thrown away...Johnny Walker Blue Label. Can't take it on the airplane even if it's sealed. Gotta be in checked luggage. One guy went back downstairs and took his mescal and tequila that he bought on his cruise and checked the bag after double wrapping it in plastic bags. Hope it got to his location in one piece and no one from the airline decided to remove it when it got through bag check.

Tomorrow is gym day and then I am going to do some checking into other federal careers. Must be something out there for a middle aged woman who can't lift more than 5 lbs. I know there is, just have to be more aggressive about finding it.

ALso have to find out if Blue Cross will cover an eye exam for me. Then I get reimbursed from my Vision carrier. I have to get new glasses and frames.

No haircut this week. Will tough it out till the weekend and then go for it. It's getting ugly and I need it shorter. Quickly.



I am looking forward to next weekend. I AM going to see Pirates of the Caribbean 3. Gotta go, love the movies.

Well that's all for now.
Life goes on.

Ciao.
-30-

Say what? You want proof? I don't think so.

There's a new manager over our department. And let's just say, he's not making the best of impressions with anyone. He's been around but he's got his own ideas and how things are run HIS WAY. I put in for my kids graduation. It's annual leave and it's my privilege to use my annual days any way I please. He sends it back to our admin person saying show proof. I wrote an email to my HR person and said if he's asking for proof that I have the time, no biggie. But if he's asking for me to provide proof of my daughter's graduation he's full of shit....BIG TIME. That's none of his business. I asked the admin if I planned on taking my birthday off would I have to show a copy of my drivers' license? She said the way things are going, probably yes. That's against the law. So hopefully our HR person will set things on the right path.

Today is my Friday. I have a decent attitude but I really would like to stay home and take the dogs to the dog park, walk around the block and not be there. My oldest is sick, so the husband took him to the doctor. I have to be at work at 1430 bright and cheerful. Well at least bright. I bought some new socks for work so I can identify mine...they keep disappearing and the person who wears black socks to work probably has a stash. These have a mark on them so I know they are mine. Socks and underwear seem to wander away from my drawers, 2 different children but they are the culprits. ( I know it's not the dog).

The husband is bitchy. Pure and simple. I don't need or want that aggravation. Have enough at work.

Oh I saw someone semi famous last night. David Hasselhoff. Looked ghastly, came flying out the jetway on a flight from Vegas. He's not that handsome anymore. Maybe he needs to book a German tour to have some ego pumping.

Ciao.

-30-

What is the use of testing if there is nothing to test for?

Did 1 1/2 days of training this week. First 4 hours was interesting and today was a cluster of usual proportions. I am on permanent light duty. I have no hope of ever going back to doing what I did when I was injured. Why then, do I have to, IN EFFECT MUST TAKE a test on what I did 3 1/2 years ago. I passed by the skin of my teeth and a lot of stuff was not what we covered in the review. It seems stupid to continue to test me for things I am not allowed to do. When I went into the training modules after I took this test, most of the modules were for the other type of position. Again I am limited to light duty. But I passed a lot of the modules and have an idea of what would be expected of me. Unfortunately, moving my arms up and down holding an instrument of torture would soon have me in ER begging for meds to stop the pain. Tomorrow I will email the HR person and ask why this is necessary since the agency has decided that I am never ever going back on the line. It's too bad that they can't see the forest for the trees. There are people who have abilities and talents that will never be used by the agency because they are biased and prejudiced against those of us who were injured doing our jobs. Rant over.

My cousin who was in the accident is hanging on. They seem to have stopped most of the intestinal bleeding but haven't been able to get him stable enough for the pelvis to be worked on. I hope that he will be able to tolerate surgery and be able to walk out of that hospital. I hope the asshat who hit him has a lot of insurance and money. All he got was a busted lip. I continue to pray for him.

Woke up wheezing this morning. Have had a dry throat and cough all week. Don't feel crappy but just have to keep drinking to keep my throat lubricated. That means I get up and have to talk a walk during the night. One night I was so tired I nearly fell asleep on the throne.

Not much else to say.
Life goes on.

Ciao.

Blood draws

I had to go to the lab this morning and have my semi annual blood drawing. Just to see if there is any niceness left in my body I guess? The woman who drew the blood was fast and efficient. Got 3 tubes full in a couple of minutes, wrapped me up and sent me on my way. I had to fast so I was kind of hungry when I got home. Bananas awaited! (They were on sale 5 lbs for $1. at the market).

I wish the weather would do something strange and have a good old fashioned thunder storm with lots of rain and lightning and storm. We need the rain so badly. My front yard is brown and I don't want to water it too much because it costs so much. But tonight I will use the sprinkler and give it a drink. The flowers would appreciate it I am sure.

I wrote my case worker. I wonder if she will give a damn or just throw the letter in the circular file. Since I have successfully completed 2 months of work that is acceptable to my level of disability, they have terminated my benefits. That is in complete opposition to what the HR person told those of us who returned. If it was related to our work injury DOL was to cover that. According to DOL, sorry, you're screwed. You can sit in front of an escalator for 8 hours and breathe so we don't care about you anymore. Point in case, I took 800 mgs of Ibuprofen and guess what, it hasn't put a dent in the pain.

Can we say pissed off? YES WE CAN!

The Spector trial is dragging on. Piffle.

Well kiddos, life goes on. What can I say?

Ciao!

Don't take a sleeping pill and a vicodin

You'll sleep like a log and not wake up till the day is half over. Not that it's a bad thing, but when the alarm went off for church it sounded way far away. Glad I could sleep in today.

Got bad news last night. My cousin, who I seemed to get into trouble with when we were kids, was severely injured in a head on car accident yesterday near his home in Lone Rock, WI. His wife and son were not with him. His wife is pretty fragile and I don't know how she is going to handle this. I hope she will be surrounded by people to help her and him deal with this.

Sat at another exciting exit last night. Not much going on.

I got a letter from the DOL proclaiming to me that my benefits have stopped since I successfully worked for 2 months. That means if I have to take time off because of my shoulder, I don't get paid for it. Thanks a whole hell of a lot. I am writing the DOL tomorrow and giving them a piece of my tiny little mind about a whole rash of stuff. Least being the fact that I have still have constant pain and that isn't going away, nor is the fact that there a few things in my non work life that I can't do.

I have a whole list of things that I need to do. Write a bunch of letters.

Had tritip burritos tonight. The kid who had the party yesterday wanted ribs. Tough, it's mother's day and thank you very much I get to have what I want.

The party wasn't happy. Remember that old Leslie Gore song about "It's My Party"? Kinda turned out like that. At least there were some people who cared for her. As I told her life will go on. And the person who caused the trouble will only have herself to blame when her life spirals into a sewer. I had problems with that girl, can't stand her father who is a drunk, and now she has caused my kid grief.

Well tomorrow is another day, have to go to lab and have bloodwork done, write my letters and then hope that I can find the chicken for dinner. Have a good salad for lunch and enjoy my clean family room. They need to do the great room next.

Ciao.

Ach ja

It's all about keeping your eyes open and watching for the bad guys! Sometimes I think it's locking the barn door after the horse has gotten out and gotten into the daffodils. Not much sense in some of it. But I know seriously that if I don't toe the party line I could really be in trouble. That's sad isn't it. What happened to 1st amendment freedom of speech and all that? Not really applicable anymore. I love my country, I just don't like the government much at all.

This is my Friday. I had an interesting afternoon/evening in class yesterday. It was okay until the last video which was BORING. Got home and relaxed though. Slept in today so I should be wide awake for the rest of the afternoon evening.

I don't know if I will go to church tomorrow. I know, I know it's Mother's Day, and my Mom doesn't want to sit all by herself in church.

I am going to have a good day. I will. I will. I have to convince myself of that. At least I hope so.

Kiddo's having her 18th birthday party today and I will miss it. That's okay. I have to work.

Ciao babies.

Not today.....

Today is one of those days that I wish I could stay home. But I won't because I get to go to a class on booooombs tonight. And tomorrow I get to do online training for 8 hours. So I'll only be in the terminal for a few hours today. That's good.

Saw someone famous yesterday. I told my husband I saw Zephram Cochrane. Dang he's tall. I know, I know that's not his name.
He's got a pony tail. I guess eccentricity is rampant in entertainment, but to me he'll always be ZC as opposed to the farmer in Babe. LOL.

Car is in the shop for at least 5 days. They have to take the bumper off and replace all the innards because that is what took the brunt when the impact hit. Thank God for insurance. They only pay 15$ a day for a rental car so we have to ante up 8$ more. But at least we will have transport.

Fog really came in last night. Dropped the temps too. 2 days ago it was 86 and today it's 63.

Not much else. Later.
Ciao.

changed my mind . i am gonna go play in a new truck

Not saying goodbye to a friend

Okay so this post is going to be about 1 thing.

Saying goodbye.

Yesterday I found out that a woman who I knew from a message board, quite well, we'd emailed and snail mailed each other a bit, died. She was young. Mid 30's. 2 kids. Loving husband. Lived in TX. Had lymphoma. Fought it for over 6 years. In the end it got into her liver and there was nothing left to do. She had chemo, radiation, alternative therapies. God wanted her in heaven so she is there. I will miss her dearly. We both had GSP's and loved them. God speed dear Paula.

The other good bye is someone who I thought was a close friend. We went on excursions and adventures. We laughed and cried. He quit a job somewhere I used to be quite involved in. He didn't tell me. He just said this is it, I'm gone, after 12 years. No nothing.

At this point it's don't let the door hit y0u on the way out. I hope you find what you are looking for. I am not going to enable you to make me the villian because I told you I felt pretty darn hurt that you talked to me the night before and didn't tell me anything. You hurt my Mom and my kid, not physically but emotionally. You've been a part of this family for 9 years and you just walk and not say anything? You've done this before to other people but I thought since you were sober now it might be different. So now you'll be somewhere else and people will stroke you and tell you how wonderful you are but you will be lonely and you will be missing something that you can't put your hands on. Friendship. You burned the bridge bucko. It's done and over. And I am glad that it is. I have my family , my friends and my dogs. And someone who is as flawed as I am but loves me none the less. Later dude. I hope you and your dogs are happy in your house on the hill. My phone is off.

So I got that off my chest. I guess you never know people do you?

Tomorrow will be my day off. I think I am going to swim till I turn into a prune just to get this anger out of me.

Ciao.

A Quick Chuckle

Karma does come around.

Tom Ridge, who was the first Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security came through the checkpoint I was near yesterday. He got the dreaded SSSS on his boarding pass. Perhaps his name is on the no fly list? Perhaps he's whatever. Anyway, he got the full 5¢ patdown. Too bad.

In other news, people still ask where the baggage claim is for the airline they came in on, where the closest area is they can smoke, where can they take their dog inside security to take a whiz, and are you sure my baggage is here. I felt sorry for one lady whose flight was delayed then cancelled. I directed her to baggage services and told her they could help her.
There were several people who thanked me profusely for telling them that yes there are restrooms by baggage services. And they walked by 2 sets of restrooms after they left the plane.

Another person came up to a group of people who work for the organization and asked them( mind you these are guvmint employeees here) if they could call Thai Airways and tell them a group was delayed? Um no. You need to contact them yourself. Not connected to airlines at all. Just a thorn in the side.

Another news item, someone at DIA dropped the ball and a jungle jet had to get reverse screened when it landed here. Isn't that locking the barn door after the horse is out? Did they check the RJ after it landed for secreted knives or weapons? Or tell people after they had already landed they couldn't take their 15 oz shampoos with them?

::insert head pounding genie here::

And a certain airline changed the code to the ops center downstairs and some of the flight crews didn't have it. But we did. I have gone into the area once to get a bottle of water from the vending machine in the lunchroom. I have actually been in the ops center, years ago when I was taking a class in travel management. It was cool. But then I had been in the TWA ops center and comm center at LAX a few times in my wasted youth.

Oh well. Another exciting day in the life of a drone.

Ciao babies.

-30-