random musings about nothing

Okay so my maple tree actually dropped a red leaf. Probably because I haven't watered out there in a coons age. At least the place got mowed. That is a good thing.

I'd even share my pills with Dr House if he could diagnose the problem I am having in both arms, like not being able to type with the last 3 fingers on my right hand and the pain I have in my left one. I'd like a diagnostic doctor not a surgeon who knows what to do inside the arm but not talking with patients. buuuuuur.

I love my pooch. The cat is the queen but my dog is my pooch.

Night alligators. It's after 5 so the chopper is up and about looking through the neighborhoods. Almost a comfortable feeling.

Another Doc Another Medicine

Since I seem to attract problems with my back like flies to honey, today was one of those days. I had problems turning my neck to the right yesterday, felt like it was pulling my spine all the way up. Then the lower ones, well they protested sitting and standing yesterday. So I go today and get a shot in my butt. A big ass shot that still stings. It's an anti inflammatory shot. I don't like it. But it might help the whole mess of spine, shoulder, and leg.


And I get a few days off to see if this and the new meds are compatible. Bad because I don't get paid, good because I manage to survive some.

Peace to all and good night.

The smurf queen

Mama Smurf is in the house.
The badges are ugly.
I have lots of things to say but I have to go and be
queen of the exit.

a rant over.

how do you tell someone that the pain you are having prevents you from doing a menial job? Lifting my arm to point is a restriction I have yet I break it every day. How do I explain it when it can't be explained?
I am so tired of hurting.
I am so tired of people asking why.
I am just so tired.
I can't imagine being mama smurf at work either.

Give me the pain implant and I will be happy. Retire me.

a rant.
over.

adjusting to meds

I get to sleep alot with these meds. Just close my eyes and I am out for a couple of hours. Haven't quite got them in synch yet.
Eureka is on. I like this show. But I have to listen to the spouses comments. I think after this program is over I'll retire to the other room and try to read some more of Anathema by Neil Stephenson. It's out today, but I got an ARC of it. Long, Long, Long.


So one day at a time and we will deal with it as it happens. I washed my new uniforms. They are still ugly. I don't have any epaulets. Guess no one will know that I am still a drone. There is nothing wrong with being a drone. At least we do the work and are ignored.



Not much else to say. I am doing very little but I am not hurting (of course when you are asleep most of the time you don't feel pain! Me and Duffy all curled up.



Sorry it's not as exciting a blog as Dave's is, but he has a lot more fun doing what he does than I do doing what I do. And exciting and as my dad used to say ====tight sphincters mark good pilots!

See ya round the next time in.

Welllllllll

Saw the pain management doctor. He wants me to have an MRI of my neck. Thinks that the steroids and the epidurals have escalated the damage to the Cspine and that's why my remaining biceps muscle is so bad. Also he said that there is a marked difference in the temperature of the right arm from the shoulder down to the elbow than the left arm. I don't notice. I'm usually having to fan myself from all the heat in my corner of the world. Which with the HR/WC dept blessing I am out of till my follow up. We are starting new meds tonight. See if I fall asleep.






Still tweaking the hot tub so we get warm water in it. It's the pump timer that we need to work with so it circulates the hot water from the hoses 0n the patio roof (black hose) into the spa all day long. When we get home, then it's nice and comfy and you don't feel like a polar bear swimmer.

New uniforms roll out this week. I will miss that since I am off duty on the 11th. But I won't be sad to say g'day to the old ones. I need to wash all my new ones and get them hung up. They are rolling out on 9-11 which people want to have as a holiday called Patriot Day. Why don't we have a holiday on December 7th and call it Pearl Harbor Day, or on June 6th and honor D Day? Or VJ and VE days? We already have Memorial Day and Veterans Day. Let's use them to honor the people that have perished.




Well I am out of opinions for right now. Have too many aches and I didn't take the usual meds because I thought my new ones would be here by now. Kids went out shopping this morning, but I told them their dad would go get them. He took #1 to work and now is at Harbor Freight, he will get them on the way home. I am going to take a Vicodin and see if it stops some of the pain.



Off to the mystical world of England at the time of the French Revolution! and I ordered 2, yes count them 2 NEW books from Amazon. Can hardly contain myself. Maybe they will be here while I am off and I can read them!

later children.

feelings

MY BACK HURTS
MY SHOULDER HURTS
I HAVE TO HAVE A REFERRAL AND AN APPROVAL FROM MY CLAIMS EXAMINER TO SEE THE PAIN MANAGEMENT DOCTOR I WANT TO SEE.
PEOPLE DON'T RETURN PHONE CALLS.
HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND, I AM WORKING THE WHOLE TIME BUT I DO GET DOUBLE PAY FOR MONDAY.WHEE.

When restrictions don't matter

Yesterday I had to take a PSE test. That means that I had to show that I was proficient in doing bag checks for my "job" as a baggage screener. Well I passed, even though I had not done a bag check in 5 years due to my injury. Well injury be damned, restrictions be damned and you're taking this test or else you are subject to termination. Isn't there some irony in the fact that my right arm has serious restrictions. They don't care. They had to pad their numbers and make it look like there are screeners who are proficient even though they haven't done the job due to injury. They send me down to baggage and on goes the sling. Won't be much good to anyone there.

later.

Just a quick update

1. Physical therapy starts soon. Oh yeah, I got a disabled placard. I am now officially disabled.

2. Have a referral to a rheumatologist.

3. These are not work related problems, but I have a list of restrictions, like avoid standing or sitting too long, no climbing stairs....we shall see.

4. Agency I am not thrilled with is reviewing the upper back claim. Deciding on it's "merit".

5. Pain Management is waiting on 1st ortho to tell agency why i need shots in my neck for a sore shoulder, and then he will refer me to 2nd ortho who maybe can say this upper back and shoulder is debilitating (it is) and I can file for medical retirement.

6. House is going to work out. Spouse weedwhacked the yards and we are watering. Things are getting put away slowly. This kitchen is never going to get done.

7. King bed is now on frame so I am not sleeping on mattress on floor, feels better. Figured out how to use my DVD player with TV friend gave us. Yeah!

8. Back to work Monday with my laundry list, my FMLA, and my good news.

Later alligators

I am still here

Have severe back problems, like 4 degenerative discs. We'll figure out what to do with them soon. Ice is your friend.
House is coming along and spa works.
More when I feel better.
da bunny

Remember the back problem

Well it came back with a vengeance. The only med that works also makes me sleep so I am in a catch 22 situation with it. Today I am seeing a pain management doctor. I have to get some relief in the shoulder. It hurts so bad. But the meds that I take for my back also work for my shoulder, except I fall asleep when I take them. The question is, take them and sleep, or don't take them and suffer?

On another note we got the fridge in. It will never leave.

Life is just a bowl of cherries, what can I do?


We checked out the spa yesterday, needs some plumbing. Hopefully soon it will whirl and bubble to it's hearts content and relax us.


Things here are okay other than the health deal. But every day above ground is a good day.



Peace----




da bunny

Still here and around

Back to work and then home to try and do 1 thing at least a day. Slept with earplugs yesterday and finally had no noise. Lots of traffic behind the walls.

Off Monday for consult with pain management doctor. No way I can get to work, get to doctor and get back. Will figure it out someway.

Agency still sucks eggs.

More when I have time to really talk about what is happening around here.

hasta la vista babies!
And this is not what it's like.....

It's done

Moving is not fun. But we are here and making our way and making the house our own. I am happy but working and then coming home at 9pm and working 2 more hours on stuff wears you out.

OTOH Ozzy said hi to me.

Need my desk drawer so I can put my keyboard lower.

More later.
I am beat.

moving

gonna be offline for a few days. moving is hell. don't let anyone tell you it isn't.
more shit than i can imagine and my arm is about done for.
missed the first ride over there, will take shit when it's later.
bye.

Waiting on keys

Here's the backyard. I can't wait for the pump to get fixed and the jacuzzi to be ready to use. Thank God we have friends who can do things.,
Packing up books and china and clothes are last. If we could move the furniture out then we could do the clothes in Goodwill, take, discard piles.
Still need a new washer/dryer will check the used appliance stores. That's a necessity. Ours lasted 21 years.

And we will buy a cord of wood this winter/fall and not depend on gas heat. The kids place won't have any heat. It's just a room. Will get some carpets to lay over the carpet that is there and pad it a bit. He'll have to come into the house for the bathroom.



I am seeing the ortho on Monday. I am miserable. Can do about 3 things and then my shoulder just screams. Of course when you sit in a chair like this 8 hours a day 5 days a week it might be a reason for concern:

A hand me down from LAPD.
I am still mulling if I should contact someone about the vitriolic email that I got from HR yesterday. Don't know if it would do any good or not. They think they are so high and mighty.

Off again on another adventure.
later.

OK and for the real news

1. We signed a lease on a nice little house but... the landlord has to sign it and we haven't heard from the agent since yesterday. Our landlord would like us out ASAP. As would we. But today is a BAD pain day. Shoulder feels like it is going to fall off.Not going to be easy to do much packing if I can't use my arm. And there is a lot of pain in my left wrist too. Falling apart. That is all that it is.

2. I need to get to see someone to get the pain relief I need.

3. Until we hear from the agent, we can't cancel our lights, gas and cable and get them transferred. Not a good thing. It's just really frustrating and I am just beyond the edge again.

4. Just got one of the nastiest emails I have ever gotten from the agency I work for regarding paperwork. The person who sent it said they will not communicate with me via private email, I turn my paperwork in in person and they will process it. So I reactivated my co email and sent an apology to the person who supposedly told me that they weren't going to respond to me. I told her it was funny I never received that email as I save all correspondence from that office. They think they are all high and mighty. Right now I just can't handle this stress.

5. My 15 yr old niece tried to OD Tuesday night. Spent 5 hours at the ER with my Mom and her making her drink the charcoal shit to neutralize the meds she took. My mom is frantic and she is just going nuts dealing with all this shit. So I am going to file an FMLA and do it that way. We will manage. We always do. Now the person who handled FMLA is not doing it anymore and someone else is. This is such a fucking mess.

I am done. Outta here.

Wish I knew then what I know now

Nose still running and shortness of breath. Am taking my steroids like a good little girl. Still house hunting. Will be calling apartments tomorrow. This has got to get settled soon. Dogs took off again today. Big one has to go to someone's house. I can't handle this running away shit. Did some more advantage on him. He's scratching himself again. Split the Advantage between him and the little one.




Both kids are working. Both are busy. We've got to lift my mattress up tomorrow so we can see what is under it, I can't do it alone. Got to get some more totes at Wal-Mart if my check actually comes in. Supposed to. I need to move away from all this tension or I will be checking myself into a 5150 watch. Tension is way too much.



Got a new phone. It's a Motorola and I got 2 ringtones. Caught hell for that. Oh well. I got the theme from Deadliest Catch and Before He Cheats. I like those songs. Can't transfer them from my Itunes to my phone.



Took a bunch of books over to my moms and some cd's for them to listen to at night before they go to bed. They like to lay in bed and listen to the music.



Time for cough syrup and more antibiotics. Took the steroids earlier than last night. Need to find a book to read/reread or something.




cheers!

Short but not so sweet

Nearly time for the next set of meds. I can breathe out of one side of my nose and hear from one ear. I take the cough syrup and fall asleep. Nothing like drooling on the pillow.


I am hungry but I can't put my finger on what it is. I think something cold and sweet like sorbet, or hot and spicy like a meatball sandwich with lots of pepperoncini on it. Subway has their $5 sale on. That would be nice. Or a container of vanilla cookies from Trader Joes. Um.



The dear spouse is blaming me for this debacle we're in now. Thanks so much. I don't drink green tea or rice milk, take huge amounts of vitamins and it's my fault the agency that I hate are such assholes. It's a day to walk on by.



Time for meds.
Time for something but I don't know what.
The person who's daughter just screamed at her.
I just give up.

Welcome to America

Now go and take your germs with you.


I am sicker than a proverbial dog.
Have codeine cough syrup, antibiotics and am ordered to drink gallons of water.
My nose is peeling.
I am not happy and trying to cough up this shit doesn't work either. It's not loose enough yet. Saw the doctor on Saturday morning. Will see him again if it's not better tomorrow. Fevers come at night, not during the daytime.
I counted how many pills I take a day. It's over 10. This pretty much expresses what it feels like. And I hate taking pills, I'd rather have my meds in liquid form. Maybe it was all those years of grinding up aspirin and antibiotics and mixing them with applesauce. UGH.


Another exciting weekend.
Blech.

Random Musings

Since I won't be here tomorrow, I'll be guarding your safety if you're flying by making sure no ter'rists cross the exit line, I wish you a happy Independence Day. While you are celebrating please remember those men and women who are stationed all over this world protecting you and those whose lives were sacrificed for us to celebrate.

If the beginning of the week was any representation, Friday will be slooooooooow. That's okay. I can make myself useful and do my job. The person who is the lead, needs to chill, we do our job and do it well. Now some one at the brain trust has decided to check each and every person's badge that comes through the exit with an ultraviolet light. Even the people who come in and out 5 or 6 times a shift doing radio checks and returning from downstairs assignments.

So, I wish they would disable me and retire me so I could get on with life otherwise the sum total of my experience with this agency is exit sitting. Life goes on.

Stay safe and have a good weekend. I still have horrible pain in my shoulder but I am ignoring it and I found a good Kathy Reichs book to read. No shopping today, no driving today. #1 kid is at the anime expo. See you later!